I’ve recently been diagnosed with breast cancer. It’s been a 3-month journey from the initial screening mammogram to diagnosis. But now I know. It doesn’t feel real yet. I can’t feel it. It’s deep so it was only detected on my screening mammogram. Women, get your mammograms!
I haven’t started treatment yet so there are no side effects. I feel the same. But so much has changed. I’m “fighting cancer” but the only “fighting” so far has been reading, learning, and going to doctor’s appointments.
Think On These Things
As a life coach one of my favorite practices is doing thought work. It’s even more important now. What I think about matters. What I dwell on makes a difference in how I go through this. Even though anxiety shows up I know that it robs me of today. One of my favorite sections of scripture talks about this:
“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.” Philippians 4:8-9, ESV
This verse directly follows a verse that tells me to “do not be anxious about anything” but to give it to God with thankfulness and to let my request be known to Him. This is always my desire, but in the past I have struggled with taking those worries back that I have given to Him. And that’s why I appreciate the concrete instructions in verses 8 & 9. I can direct my thoughts and the promise is that the God of peace will be with me.
A Deeper Faith
One of the ways I direct my thinking in a more positive direction is to play worship music. I have playlists of songs that have specific meanings for me. It’s fascinating to me how every Bible verse and every worship song takes on new meaning when you are going through a tough time. I have always wanted to write blog posts to share some of my favorite songs. And with this post I am finally going to do it. I hope these songs will speak to you too.
This particular song by Shane and Shane has been a favorite of mine for several years. It is from the book of Job and if you’ve never read that book it’s about intense suffering and how God can be found in the midst of it. My prayer, of course, is to be healed. But my testimony is that even if He doesn’t heal me here on earth I still praise Him. I encourage you to listen to the song linked below as well as the excerpt of a teaching by pastor John Piper that is part of the video.
“My heart and flesh may fail
The earth will all give way
But with my eyes, with my eyes I’ll see the Lord
Lifted high on that day
Behold, the Lamb that was slain
And I’ll know every tear was worth it all
Though You slay me
Yet I will praise You
Though You take from me
I will bless Your name
Though You ruin me
Still I will worship
Sing a song to the one who’s all I needThough tonight I’m crying out
Let this cup pass from me now
You’re still all that I need
You’re enough for me”
Excerpt from Though You Slay Me by Shane & Shane
I noticed this week that a popular tune is sometimes borrowed and repurposed with new words for a Christian venue.
I pray that God’s peace be with you and your family and your energy is enough to help others you will meet on your journey.
Blog on !
I love this so much!! I am praying for you daily and admire how you are working through this 💙
Thank you for being so open and vulnerable about what you’re going through.. You have always been an encourager and that shines through now more than ever. I pray that you will find every treasure there is to find on the path you’re on. Every mercy, every moment of joy, every blessing…I pray your eyes are open to all of it and that you won’t miss a single thing. You are loved, cared for and valued—now and for all time.
“And I will give you treasures hidden in the darkness— secret riches. I will do this so you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, the one who calls you by name.” Isaiah 45:3
I am certainly looking for the treasures along the way. Thank you for your prayers and encouragement.
Tammy,
Thank you for sharing your heart and your journey. This helps to know how to pray for you, which I will do daily.
It’s interesting you shared this video by Shane and Shane. A friend of mine was telling me about the song and album just a couple weeks ago. She had it on in her car, but we were talking so I didn’t get to take it in. I will download it on my phone so I can be in prayer & worship with you in spirit.
I love you, my friend, and hope to talk with you soon. I’m working 10-6 the next few days so I’ll try to catch you one evening. Is there a better day/time?
I am off this week so it’s a perfect time to catch up.
Thank you for sharing your heart, Tammy. I’ve been covering, and will continue to cover, you and your family with prayer ❤️.
Romans 15:13, “Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.“
Yes. It’s so strange to be feeling all the things that come with a diagnosis like this and still have unexplainable joy.
One year breast cancer free! Listened to my inner voice. It was almost a calling like. This started my spiritual journey of breast cancer at 41, detected on my first mammogram! My surgical oncologist asked how I found out or what concerned me. I said I just listened to my body, it was telling me to schedule a mammogram. He said wow, I have felt many breasts in my career, I would have never known this was cancer. I had very fibrous breast tissue. You aren’t told what you are feeling for how would one know? I am truly blessed, I’ve been a CMA for 16 years, during this journey I was in the middle of taking my generals for Nursing and working in a clinic….during a pandemic. I never thought “why me?” My thought was, “what is the purpose, what am I supposed to learn?” I marched on. I didn’t quite school, I’m a wife, a mother to two boys. I was diagnosed January 2021, I elected for a double mastectomy. That was scheduled on March 4th. The only day on the calendar that tells you to do something…March fourth! I also elected to not have chemotherapy. I had four nodes removed, all negative. They were able to get well beyond clear margins. Because of that, I didn’t need radiation either. I am on Tamoxifen and really don’t have any side effects from that. I am currently in my first semester of core nursing and expected to graduate Spring 2023!
Faith got me through this journey. Faith gets me through my days. Faith is with me every step, everyday! Fight on Warrior!